I Am Not Old: A Love Letter to Women at the Threshold

By Dehyana

Virgo Season & the Crown Years

As the Sun enters Virgo, we step into a season of harvest — a time of gathering what has ripened and honouring the cycles that shape our lives. Virgo, the wise Earth goddess, teaches us that nothing is wasted, that every season has meaning. For women, especially those entering the Crone years, this is not decline, but coronation. We are not fading — we are being crowned. This is the invitation to embrace ageing with wisdom and joy.

A Childhood Memory

When I was little, I remember watching my grandmother. To me, she seemed ancient — her hands wrinkled and worn from a lifetime of housework, her skin sagging in places I didn’t know skin could sag, deep lines carved around her ever-red lips. I would stare at her in disbelief, thinking, Wow… she’s really, really old. And now here’s the punchline — she was probably the same age I am today. Sixty-nine. Life has a wicked sense of humour, doesn’t it?
Here’s the truth: I don’t want to be old, and neither do the women I’ve talked to. Not in the way we’ve been taught to imagine it. Instead, I want us to embrace ageing with wisdom and joy.

What I Don’t Want

I don’t want to slip into irrelevance or shrink into fear.
I don’t want to ask myself, “Have I done enough?” and feel the pang of regret.
I don’t want to disappear into the background as though my voice no longer matters.
I don’t want to be told I’m “too old” for love, adventure, or new beginnings.
I don’t want to sit on the sidelines of my own life, watching the world move on without me.
I don’t want to dim my light because society insists that only youth is beautiful.
I don’t want to be reduced to aches and ailments when inside I feel more awake, more alive, more myself than ever.

What I Do Want

I want to be authentic. Cool. Alive. Relevant.
I want to embrace my wrinkles as stories written in time, not collapse beneath them.
I want my body to stay strong enough to carry me into new landscapes and new experiences.
I want my eyes to sparkle with curiosity, wide open to wonder.
I want my heart to expand, not contract, as the years go by.
I want to stay magnetic — not because of the smoothness of my skin, but because of the light I radiate from within.
I want to laugh freely, love deeply, and live boldly.
I want to wear these years not as a burden, but as a crown.
This is what it means to embrace ageing with wisdom and joy.

Demeter’s Harvest

In astrology, the Sun’s passage through Virgo reminds us of Demeter — the great goddess of harvest, cycles, and the eternal dance of loss and renewal. When her daughter Persephone was taken into the underworld, Demeter grieved so deeply that the earth itself went barren.
Every woman knows this story. We have all lost something — youth, a loved one, a dream. We have all stood at the edge of grief and thought: Will my life ever bloom again?

But Persephone always returns. The earth grows green again. Life is cyclical, not linear. So too with us: the so-called “losses” of age are not an ending, but a return. They invite us to ripen, to embody wisdom we could never hold as maidens. They invite us to embrace ageing with wisdom and joy.

The Reframe of Age

What if every year was not a slipping away, but an alchemical distillation? What if instead of fearing the “vortex of ageing,” we saw it as the multiverse handing us a new role: Wise One, Storykeeper, Sacred Teacher, Shaman…

I want women everywhere to know:

• You are not less relevant because of your years; you are more magnetic.
• You are not invisible; you are the flame others gather around.
• You are not withering; you are fermenting like a fine wine into something rich and rare.

This is the reframe: to embrace ageing with wisdom and joy as a sacred passage, not a punishment.

A Playful Benediction

So let us laugh at the illusion of time together, my crowned ones, and me too. Let us dance, with saggy ‘bat wings’ and all. Let us share our life stories with one another. Let us wear our joy like sacred oils. And together, let us remind the world:

We are not old. We are Crowned Crones.
We are not old. We are the fine wine that life has been waiting to pour.
We are not old. We are the harvest — and yes, we are still blooming.

To all women reading this: What part of yourself feels like Demeter today — grieving, tired and somewhat sad, wondering if your time has passed? And what part feels like Persephone — still curious, still wide-eyed, still ready to rise again?
That is your story. That is your legacy. And it is marvellous, darling!

The Voice of the Crowned Crone

I do not shrink from my years — I rise with them.
I wear my wrinkles as jewels, each one etched with love, loss, and laughter.
I walk with curiosity, not to cling to youth, but because my spirit is eternal and ever becoming.
I laugh until my belly aches, because joy is not behind me — it is my crown.
I stand rooted in the body that has carried me across every threshold,
Maiden, Mother, Crone and I honour her strength.

I am sovereign in my wisdom, unapologetic in my presence, radiant in my truth.
I am the Crone. I wear the Crown.
I am the harvest and the flame.
I choose to embrace ageing with wisdom and joy.

If you are standing at this threshold and feeling the call to reclaim your crown, I invite you to journey with me. Through Guided Spiritual Recovery and Astrology sessions, I offer a space for you to embrace ageing with wisdom and joy, and to discover the radiant truth of who you are becoming. Click here to read more and book a session.

In sovereignty and wisdom — Love, Dehyana